The Loop

I’m lucky to have grown up in a Christian family. We prayed every night before dinner, and before bedtime (and the multitude of books I begged my parents to read). At times it’s something that’s become so routine, part of a checklist before I can start eating or begin my day.

But somewhere between checking boxes and chasing productivity, I forgot why I ever prayed in the first place. Prayer morphed into another task on my spiritual to‑do list—something I had to do so I could feel like a “good Christian.” Instead of a lifeline to God, it became paperwork.

If you’ve felt that, welcome. Here’s what I’m relearning about the true importance of prayer that is helping me trade the checklist for real conversation again.

• Call it what it is. I start prayer by naming the elephant: “Father, I’ve turned this into homework again. I’m here because I need You, not because I need to impress You.” Honesty breaks the checklist spell.
  
  
• I stopped trying to make prayer look perfect. Some days my prayers are quiet and deep. Other days they’re just: “Today sucks. Help.” And that’s enough.

Romans 8:26 reminds us: “We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us... in accordance with the will of God.”

Even when I don’t have the words, the Spirit fills in the gaps. That’s one of my favorite promises in the Bible.

• I found rhythms that work for me. I used to think prayer had to be a 30-minute sit-down session every morning. But sometimes, it looks like whispering prayers on my drive. Talking to God while I’m folding laundry. Writing a few lines in my journal before bed.

The goal isn’t length — it’s connection.

• Celebrate “showing up” wins. I used to grade prayer by length or eloquence. Now the metric is presence: Did I turn my attention toward God today? If the answer is yes—even briefly—that’s success.

My prayer life is far from perfect but hoping that these reminders can help encourage you to show up imperfectly where you are.

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