September 24, 2023
Do Not Disturb
- Matt Nickoson
Sermon Notes
Sex was created by God to be a bonding experience so powerful that two separate things could become one through this moment.
Genesis 2:24 NIV
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. – God
Mark 10:8-9 NIV
"and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." – Jesus
Ephesians 5:31 NIV
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." – Apostle Paul
Sex is beautifully designed by God to foster oneness in marriage.
1 Corinthians 6:16 NIV
Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, "The two will become one flesh."
"Kathy and I were virgins when we married. Even in our day, that may have been the minority experience, but that meant that on our wedding night we were not in any position to try to impress or entice one another. All we were trying to do was to tenderly express with our bodies the oneness we had first begun feeling as friends and which had then had grown stronger and deeper as we fell in love. Frankly, that night I was clumsy and awkward and fell asleep anxious and discouraged. Sex was frustrating at first. It was the frustration of an artist who has in his head a picture or a story but lacks the skills to express it." – Timothy and Kathy Keller, The Meaning of Marriage
In Song of Solomon: The wife speaks first, the wife speaks last, and the wife speaks most, EXCEPT when it comes to the moment when they make love.
Song of Songs 4:1 NIV
How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes behind your veil are doves. Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from the hills of Gilead.
Song of Songs 4:2 NIV
Your teeth are like a flock of sheep just shorn, coming up from the washing. Each has its twin; not one of them is alone.
Song of Songs 4:3 NIV
Your lips are like a scarlet ribbon; your mouth is lovely. Your temples behind your veil are like the halves of a pomegranate.
Song of Songs 4:4 NIV
Your neck is like the tower of David, built with courses of stone; on it hang a thousand shields, all of them shields of warriors.
Song of Songs 4:5 NIV
Your breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies.
Song of Songs 4:6 NIV
Until the day breaks and the shadows flee, I will go to the mountain of myrrh and to the hill of incense.
Song of Songs 4:7 NIV
You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you.
Song of Songs 4:9 NIV
You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace.
Song of Songs 4:10 NIV
How delightful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume more than any spice!
Song of Songs 4:11 NIV
Your lips drop sweetness as the honeycomb, my bride; milk and honey are under your tongue. The fragrance of your garments is like the fragrance of Lebanon.
Song of Songs 4:12 NIV
You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain.
Song of Songs 4:13-14 NIV
Your plants are an orchard of pomegranates with choice fruits, with henna and nard, nard and saffron, calamus and cinnamon, with every kind of incense tree, with myrrh and aloes and all the finest spices.
Song of Songs 4:15 NIV
You are a garden fountain, a well of flowing water streaming down from Lebanon.
Song of Songs 4:16 NIV
Awake, north wind, and come, south wind! Blow on my garden, that its fragrance may spread everywhere. Let my beloved come into his garden and taste its choice fruits.
Both the groom and the bride are giving the other what they desire in this moment.
"With sex, we were trying to be vulnerable to each other, to give each other the gift of bare-faced rejoicing in one another, and to know the pleasure of giving one another pleasure. And as the weeks went by, and then the years, we did it better and better. Yes, it means making love sometimes when one or even both of you are not "in the mood." But sex in a marriage, done to give joy rather than to impress, can change your mood on the spot. The best sex makes you want to weep tears of joy, not bask in the glow of a good performance." - Timothy and Kathy Keller, The Meaning of Marriage
Song of Songs 5:1a NIV
I have come into my garden, my sister, my bride; I have gathered my myrrh with my spice. I have eaten my honeycomb and my honey; I have drunk my wine and my milk.
Song of Songs 5:1b NIV
Eat, friends, and drink; drink your fill of love.
Are you being a selfless lover to your spouse in your marriage? If not, why?
Is there any area where you need to ask God to heal your heart, soul, mind, or body related to sex?
Is there any change you sense God is telling you to make in your approach to sex? Ask Him for the courage to do that.